Since Amstell left, my favourite remaining little pop show (RIP Popworld. RIP) Never Mind The Buzzcocks has lost its way. Depending on the guest host it has either left you wishing for the return of Simon Amstell, or, in some drastic cases, the return of Mark Lamarr. Which is No Good Thing and would possibly bring about the apocalypse.
That all changed last night. Best friend of Lady Coren, Claudia Winkleman hosted with wit, charm and gumption. And if that wasn’t good enough, we were also treated to Jamelia as a guest. I don’t know how much they pay her to appear, but whatever it is, it’s not enough. She is fantastic.
She started off telling us about the movie that she’s currently filming in Hungary, and how Vinnie Jones pushed her into the cage of an allegedly vegetarian bear that was too busy snacking on chicken sausage sandwiches and coke. But never mind because in the fair words of Jamelia herself, the movie is shit so we probably won’t ever see it. But that was only the beginning, then she regaled us with the story of the time when a fan shoved her baby through her car window as the car carried on. Sadly the baby is now back with its frankly terrible mother, because Jamelia didn’t think she could get away with passing off a white baby as her own. And then came the best part of the show. She had delicious revenge on some rapper person who several years ago tried to sell a story on her, and as Dame Jamelia of Pop-stardom said herself: “I just find it funny that I’m here and he’s over there in the line-up.”. Quite.
Witness the brilliance on iPlayer here.
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I don’t understand why people thought Jamelia’s story about the bear was funny. I thought it was incredibly sad, especially given that she posed for PETA and is supposedly a fan of animal rights. But here she laughs when saying this bear she was filming with hadn’t been fed for two days, had coke poured on it in the cage and had sausages on the end of a broomstick jabbed at it through the cage bars. How is any of this funny? I’m pretty sure that actually goes against a lot of animal cruelty laws.
Oooh Rochelle, you’re such a PETAphile! LOOOOOOOOOOOL!111